I wanted to tell you, about the sidewalk I took
on the way to where your garden stayed.
Where flowers adorned the way,
curled and wilted in their fading beauty.
The flora of gold whispered your name,
calling me to play with them.
They swayed in grace,
and their scent was carried in the wind.
It took strength so great
to keep my legs from folding.
To stand in before your place of rest,
to be able to face after fate’s cruelty.
Once more, I am reminded with no hesitation
of your love, unchanged and dormant.
Yet, the very same love,
that brought me to the dark corners of my mind,
Where only yellow petals blindfolded me.
When sunflowers could not find the sun,
they turn to face each other.
Or so I have been told;
Was this why I’ve been turning to you?
I sit in front of you,
my eyes tracing the engraved letters of your name.
I painted a frame,
of the sunshine I won’t complain.
My love was full of cowering in pain,
beneath the roof protecting me,
from falling powerful rain.
Lovely memories of yours and mine,
they did not mean to betray me.
For the truth was a portrait, starry gaze.
The colors blurred and faded,
and, tearfully, I find myself
leaning over your gravestone.
These fields stand tall and high.
Telling our finite promises,
Into the cloudy skies above.
All for heaven to listen.
These flowers in this garden,
the lingering monument of what once was us.
Each one but a constant reminder,
that I had to leave this bouquet
at the feet of your grave.
Many stories remaining untold,
many apologies refusing to be spoken—
Your gravestone was the only thing that listened,
when everything fell apart.
But today, is when I have to let go.
You were my favorite miracle,
And yet, like all stars, you must depart;
You deserve to spend your days in happiness.
Caff, the winner of WriterVana's July 2022 writing contest, is a fanfiction, fluff, and angst writer.