Follow Your Heart

Word Count: 1176

Warnings: LGBT+ full of fluff and angst

Created for the Tropetember Event - Pinning Today was the day. I was going to confess. No matter what.

It took a lot of pep talk. A lot of goading from my friends to get me to this point. My pinning has not been a secret, and I was horrible at keeping it that way. I’ve had a crush on my best friend ever since I could remember, and because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship I kept my emotions at bay. Waiting for the right time.

Though it never seemed like the right time.

The right time was a myth. It was something that made you procrastinate telling someone something important. I knew that if I didn’t tell her now, I’d lose her.

Was it too soon after her recent breakup? Probably. Though she seemed to be over it, and while I knew she was good at hiding certain emotions, it seemed genuine. They’ve been broken up for a few months now. Surely it was enough time?

“You can do this, Hannah…” I murmured to myself, straightening my back. “You’ve practiced in front of the mirror for years. Tell her.”

“Talking to yourself again, Queen?” I jumped, whirling around to see another one of my friends giving me a smirk. Silas was like a brother to me, and he knew of my crush on Serena.

I stuck my tongue out at him childishly, pouting. “I’m trying to encourage myself and you’re not helping,” I accused with a roll of my eyes.

His eyes brightened at that. “Oh? Are you going to tell her then?” He wondered, eagerness in his tone. They’ve all been waiting for this moment. Everyone was in the know, and they seemed to think that Serena had a crush on me as well. That she used the little flings to make me think she didn’t so that she wouldn’t ruin the friendship we had.

That made two of us, at least. If their theory was true.

Which in my mind was not. If she had feelings for me wouldn’t she tell me? She was much more outgoing than I was, given her many different relationships that she pursued. Hell, she was even on the dance team and was the captain - elected by her peers. If that wasn’t enough, she could even sing and play the guitar.

I had zero such talents. I was clumsy to a fault, had the voice of a dying cat, was awkward as hell. Sure I had many friends, mostly school friends that I never hung out with after, but that was all because of Serena. Besides Silas, as we met at a conference a few years back and have been tight ever since.

“I’m trying,” I finally let out as he kept staring at me. “I want to,” I replied as he huffed, rolling his eyes. “I’m too awkward to do it. What if she says no? I ruin the friendship, things get awkward and the next thing you know she’s leaving the school forever and I won’t speak to her until the high school reunion we’ll have in five years!” I exclaimed dramatically and glared when Silas laughed hysterically. “It’s not funny, Si! It’s a real thing that could happen!” It was an actual fear that I had for all of us, really. We were closer and closer to graduation. Would we keep in touch afterwards?

“I’m sorry Han,” he chuckled, trying to let up with his laughter, “but we’ve been telling you that she does like you back. You just have to be the first one to initiate it.” Yes, they all have been trying to tell me that, but with my anxiety and fears I just could not believe that they were right. “You have to make the first jump for happiness, Hannah.” He told me again gently, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder.

Sighing deeply, I relaxed a little bit - looking over at Hannah who was talking to someone that was on her dance squad. I nodded my head a few times. “Alright,” I concluded, making Silas’ eyes brighten at my declaration. “I’ll do it, but you have to ask Emma out after.” I accused him, making him blush. Emma was another friend of ours that I knew he had a crush on. It was cute, really, and I could see him and her being an adorable couple.

“Fine,” was all he said, though I wasn’t sure that he would keep his word. Taking a deep breath I walked over towards Serena and the other girl, who I thought was named Taylor.

“Hannah!” Serena grinned when she saw me. “You know Taylor, right?” She introduced me and I was glad I remembered the girl's name. We had a few classes together, but we weren’t at all close.

“Yeah I know her,” I nodded towards Taylor, who did the same. “Uh, Rena, can I talk to you in private for a minute?” I asked nervously, not wanting to lose confidence in this again.

Serena raised an eyebrow at me but nodded. “Sure, we’ll talk strategy later Tay, okay?” Taylor nodded, giving me a small smile before walking away from us. We watched as Taylor walked away before Serena turned towards me. “So, what was it that you needed to talk to me about?” She wondered, though there was something in her eye that I couldn’t quite name.

Was that hope?

“I, uh…” I trailed off, taking a deep breath. You can do it. “I’ve liked you for a while now,” I admitted, making her eyes widen in surprise. “As in like, like,” I added, wanting her to understand what I was talking about, even though I knew she did. “I didn’t want to ruin our friendship so I kept it a secret. But I think I’ve come to love you, and I don’t know what to do. I can’t suppress it anymore…” I trailed off again sheepishly.

“I…” I winced, embracing myself for the fatal blow. “Hannah, I’ve been waiting for you to say something for a while now…” She trailed off sheepishly, chuckling in amusement. My mouth dropped. So they were right?!

“Huh?!” I gasped, my mouth still open. “What do you mean?”

“Hannah, I’m always the one initiating things,” Serena started with a giggle. “I wanted you to do it. I thought maybe if I had a few relationships that were meaningless, you’d get enough courage to ask me.” She admitted and my heart lurched. So those other relationships she’d been in meant nothing to her? Kind of felt sorry for those people, but that made my heart warm at the possibilities that seemed to be endless.

“Oh…” was all I could say to that, laughing. “Well, this is awkward. Go on a date with me?” I suddenly felt bold enough to ask. Now that I knew she liked me back.

Serena grinned at me, taking my hand. “I’d be honored.” And that was the day I learned that I should always do what my heart wants. To never let the small things be taken for granted.